wherefore art thy cellular telephone?

i'm starting to understand how my parents have a hard time with things like cell phones and computers.  i've decided to cut them a little slack and dish out some sympathy instead of telling them over and over how cool unlimited texting is and how bonding it is for large families who live all over the world.  if i lived closer i'd sit them down and give them the "texting and photo sharing for dummies" lesson so they could experience the joy of seeing their grandkids play sports, act in plays and dress the dogs up for an impromptu canine fashion show.  it's not that they're especially retarded (well, maybe just a tad but then so am i and we all know that there is a spider-web thin line between "specialness" and genuis) and they aren't really that old, aren't 60s the new 50s? but for god's sake! they were around to witness the birth of things like the t.v. set and watched cars evolve from big hunks of metal to sleek (even battery powered!) machines. they witnessed the first computer, car phone, cd, dvd and eventually, the cell phone. of course they fought it at first, who wouldn't? they had lived all these years without one so why should they dish out another $80-$120 a month for the "privelege" of now being track-able by any number of folks. plus they had no idea how to use one. that didn't last long though and when the last of their kids joined the verizon cult and were now "in," they caved. so cool, my parents now have cell  phones and while my mom's doing pretty well with hers, my dad has yet to learn to do simple tasks such as check his messages or leave a personal greeting.  the times, as they say, have definitely changed.  i was talking to my kids the other day about records. i heard myself saying, "so ya, they were these big, black, vinyl...um...c.d.s" (for lack of a better description for 10 and 13 year old boys' minds) i told them about the big, wooden, coffin-like console that we had in the living room. how my mom would carefully shake out an elvis album and gently place it on the turnstyle then lift up the needle and set it on the edge. i'd sit on the floor with my ear pressed to the big speaker that was decorated with curlicued wood and listen to the king croon about the poor little boy with the runny nose who played in the street while the cold wind blows in the ghetto. as i strive for simplicity in this age of amazing technological advances i have to wonder if having an i-pod is all that when i can't even manage to find the cord that charges it or figure out how to put new songs on it without deleting my entire existing library. i wonder if i could do without all of these so called "conveniences" now.  would my life would be richer for it or am i just fighting something that's new and hard for my stubborn brain to understand?  i suppose i just need to figure out how to make them work for and not against me. or get a computer-gnome to sit on my shoulder who can hop off and fix anything that needs fixing with a snap of my fingers. it's not that i don't think i can learn.  i just don't really want to. and while i'm passing out breaks for my parents and the others in their age bracket, let me give myself one too. i've had to deal with things as a parent that my parents never had to deal with while they were raising me and my four sibs. i had no cell phone to take away, computer to be dragged off of or monitored, no i-pod or game-boy or wii. nope. if i sassed back i was sent to my room until they remembered i existed or forgot i was in trouble.  i sometimes wonder if romeo and juliet would have been alive if they had unlimited text capabilities. but how would their story be one of such tragedy and undying love without all that senseless drama?  "oh romeo, oh romeo, what for art thoust cell number romeo?"